Fury :'(

I will never be able to understand how something like this can happen. I will never be able to understand why someone would let this happen. And I will never be able to understand how someone could be the one to carry out such an action. In all honesty, I don't want to be able to understand how they do what they do. I just want to be able to put a stop to it.

I don't know how to explain what I wish to say very well but I shall give it my best shot.

I have - as a lot of you will already know - a love for human rights, and I have currently been reading a book called Nothing But the Truth by Anna Politkovskaya - an amazing journalist and a role model of mine. In it are horrifying accounts of human rights abuses, including - don't read on if sensitive/pictures things too easily/etc -

soldiers setting fire to a mother in front of her child. How could anyone do that? And how could a leader of a country not demand those responsible be brought to justice? How can a leader of a country in some ways strengthen the positions of the abusers? Do they not care? How can their hearts not go out to those sufferring? Are they not haunted at night in their dreams? I know I have been haunted by something I have only read about and so I do not understand how those who are actively involved in the abuses happening can escape such dreams. Is it simply that they are so cold hearted they remain unaffected? Yet some of these people have families - how can one love their own family so much while not have feeling for others? I will never understand. I want to make things stop - such as through the letter writing I do for Amnesty International and the like. I have been contemplating not being a doctor any more and instead becoming a human rights lawyer, but no matter what I end up being I shall *never* stop campaigning for human rights. It isn't possible for me to do so. I, unlike those cold-blooded killers, actually care about the people. A part of me would like to end this post by calling the abusers 'bastards' but I am not sure if that is, for example, mature... but stuff it... they're bastards.

URGENT *sensitive*

My Human Rights appeal this week is an action that needs to be taken quickly. The link is here http://amnesty.org.uk/actions_details.asp?ActionID=607 and now I shall give you a quick description about this terrible case.

Iran is a state party to both the International Covenant on Civil and Political Rights (ICCPR) and the Convention on the Rights of the Child (CRC), which both do not allow people to be executed for crimes they committed when they were under 18 years. However, despite this Iran is planning on executing Mohammad Reza Haddadi, who committed his crime when he was 15 years old. Mohammad's lawyer believes there is a chance he shall be executed soon. Iran has - even recently - shown that it will execute those it should not - such as the case of Delara Darabi. I was personally involved in trying to ensure she was not executed and I was deeply pained when the Iranian authorities ignored her human rights (as well as the fact she had been granted a 2-month stay of execution and that new evidence had been ignored) and executed her. Iran also broke Iran's *own* law by carrying out her execution without letting her lawyer know 48 hours in advance. So please, please try to help Mohammad by going to the Amnesty International link I have provided. Also, please include in the email (if you have the energy - otherwise you can just use the prewritten email provided) that Iran has an obligation to give 48 hours notice before Mohammad's execution if it is to go ahead. At least this way, if they do decide to execute him, we will know and hopefully it means more pressure can be placed on the Iranian Government.
Thank-you :) xxx

I want to be one of them

Urgh, I have a bug :-S so am back to being stuck in bed. Oh joy - not!

Yesterday was the 5th anniversary of the London bombings. I was nervous it was going to happen again.

God and I are not having a brilliant relationship at the moment. I am so very close to no longer being a Christian.

Anyway, on to the main part of this post - women. More specifically, women who have made a change in the world, for example by making it possible for us to have equal rights with men.
I love having all of the rights I have but sometimes I wish I was in another era; one where I could be with the women bringing about the change - be one of them, instead of just enjoying the result.
I want to bring about big change in the world, just like those women did.

I tried so hard :'(

I worked my backside off on my first essay and I got the results back today - I didn't do very well and a part of me just doesn't understand how I did as badly as I did. For the Learning Outcomes or whatever they are called I got one Achieved, two Just Not Achieved and the rest Just Achieved. :'( I know some would say I didn't do too badly but I place too great expectations on myself and beat myself up when I don't reach them.

I know I shouldn't expect to do amazingly - I was too ill to learn how to do essays during school. And I know I shouldn't be so hard on myself - but I am just such a perfectionist that I can't help myself.

I am embarrassed by my grade. :'(

It is going to be a struggle for me to post this as I hate to admit my failures and find it really tough to but I suppose it will be good for me to post it. I have to stop being so ashamed.

Pretty dull update ;)

On Thursday I was meant to go to the local doctor's surgery but was not well enough to go so it has been rearranged for this Thursday. My health was doing really well but I have gone down hill BUT my mum has a bug and I am having the same symptoms as her so it is maybe a bug making me worse - and we all know how ME reacts to bugs! So yes, hopefully it is just a bug. If it is a bug - and it does seem that way - then on the plus side it is showing my body is actually fighting it off as even though I have been feeling terrible, compared to how I used to be when ill with a virus, my body has not been 'taken over' as much.

So yeah, not really done much since last Wednesday - most days - if not all (my memory hasn't improved lol) I have been able to go downstairs for a bit. And on Thursday I picked up a bit in the evening so I went out in my wheelchair and again managed a bit of a walk :D

So yes, that is my rather dull update ;)